I ate sugar and..............

Accountability is important for me.

It is very important to my weight loss.  It took me a long time to be accountable for my actions.  I am not going to get into all of that but.............

I had really hoped and believed that I could continue on my weight loss road map, drilling right through the holidays without indulging in garbage food and drink.

I did not do it.

I ate garbage which included lots of white flour, sugar, a CAKE BOSS CAFE cupcake, a NYC cannolli, greasy pepperoni, loads of fat filled cheese cubes, dozens of cookies, too many craft beers, a bottle of cotton candy vodka, lasagna, garlic bread, and only God can remember the rest.

I feel like crap.
I am tired.
I am not happy with my actions or lack thereof.

Nothing I can do now but STOP it.

On the good side of this time period, I kept up my exercise regime.  I knew I over-indulged but did manage to continue to work out as I am scheduled right through the holiday period. 

I am glad I  kept on my exercise route as I am  sure I would have put on my average "10 pounds" during the month had I not.

 I am happy that last March 12th, I decided to get serious about what I put in my mouth and decided to get active.

I lost just shy of 50 pounds since that date.

 I found about 7 of those pounds this month. 

If I had not started a weight loss journey in March,  I would have been at least 60 pounds heavier today. 

 Rick is making our traditional New Years Day sauerkraut and pork. I am eating it.  I am going to enjoy it. 

Today, I am done with all the goodie crap laying around..

Tomorrow I am going to be back to clean Eating. 

Back on the horse again!

~Lisa

Photo below was taken about the time I began:

Taken last week:

Why I am your "Follower"

I like that I often fall upon a blog post or  a message board that interests me.
I blog for me. Sometimes I ramble with no direction , but it is something that I am trying to work out in myself. It has no value to anyone, but me.

I have come across people whose blogs have touched a heartstring. I have came across blogs from people that I believe I was led to to either uplift, or to be uplifted by. I have seen mean blog posts by people. I have seen delieriously "up" people" posts, "debbie downer"posts and every kind of blog post in between.

These are brief glimpses into other's lives that could be an indicator of who they actually are, or, they may be only a message of how they feel today; at the moment. It may also be a glimpse into what they wish to be.

When I do fall upon someone who touches me, or interests me, I "follow" their blog. The reason being I like to see what is going on in their world.

I don't feel obligated to visit each  page to leave comments routinely. I would not expect others to feel that way either.

I like that we have the opportunity to cyber mingle with many. If I am a "follower" of your blog, it because I was drawn in by you.

It may have been your humor, your faith, your distress, your achievements, your pictures or any multitude of things.

I am a people-liker.

I am also a fan of Fred Rogers. He is one person that I had always wished to meet, but never did (except in the neighborhood)

I still feel he was my friend, in a cyberlike sorta kinda way. I would have wanted to be his neighbor.

Mr. Rogers helped me as a child during difficult times. I went vicariously with him on field trips learning more about life.

What I am trying to say is:

Its a beautiful day in my neighborhood......................

I am glad I have met you in this neighborhood. I am glad you are my neighbor.

I don't expect much.

I do want you to let me know if there is something that I can help you with.
I wont make contact with you frequently, but that does not mean I do not care.

I hope you stay. I just like knowing you .

P.S. Don't worry about spending too much time with me. I believe in quality time over quantity.

I say what others are thinking....outloud

I am known for carrying my emotions on my outside, naked for the world to see. I don't mind that actually. I find it cleansing. When I am mad, people know it. If they have hurt me they know it.




When I am upset by someone or something it is my choice to react that way. When I chose to react that way, I am wasting emotion on hurt feelings or anger.



I have learned that I don't have the energy to harbor those emotions. They don't produce anything positive; and drain me.



I am the one that says what others feel. I don't let anger or hurt feelings fester, but go directly to the person(s) who can change the situation or who is provoking wasted emotional energy it in me.



Co-workers have commented that they know I speak for them when they don't have the voice.



This personality trait is part of who I am.



Just saying......

Seriously, wtf am I doing and WHY?

With much dedication and determination, I have been working out and eating relatively clean since March 12, 2011.  I have lost 47.8 pounds. 

I am backsliding for the past week and admitting it publically. 

I ate pizza, I made chocolate waffles (albeit, only mixed with applesauce instead of with eggs and oils), I drank too much, I ate this crap way too much. 

I feel like I am out of control again.  I really wonder why?

How can I work so so so diligently and then not care?
I do care obviously since I am weighing every day.

I have still kept up with my exercise program.  I get up at 5:15 every work day and do cardio 5x per week and strength 3x per week.

Eating, well, no.

I know I am looking much better physically.
I know I feel better.

I know others notice.

Do I want to not be noticed?
Am I more comfortable not being noticed?

Am I ambushing myself?

Help.

Dweezil

I know our fur babies help us to be better humans.

 We got Dweezil at the Pittsburgh Animal Friends, a no kill shelter that I absolutely admire.

We knew they rescued this group of puppies from under a step in the city. The owner of the building pepper sprayed them and called animal control. When animal control arrived he found a nursing stray *(not the mom) and another adult female dog laying on the puppies to keep them warm. It was fridgid weather. Alll were taken to Animal Friends. The puppies were six weeks and went to foster homes.

Hubby and I were first in line to get into Animal Friends that Saturday.

I picked one puppy to see, and went to get a cousellor.

When I got to the kennel, hubby said, "he's the one" (not the one I picked). Dweezil was sitting still at the corner of the kennel by hubby while the others were being puppy like all over the kennel.

Anyhow, we took Dweezil to the "get acquainted room" and Rick said something like "c'mere you dufus" and out of absolutely no where, I said No he is Dweezil!!! It stuck. I have no idea why that name came to my head.

But after naming him we of course knew that Frank Zappa's kid was named Dweezil but I researched the word. Dweezil means :



1) An imaginary animal, probably resembling a weasel, but more cartoon like. They are said to be mischievous and charming creatures, which allows them to commit atrocities without repercussions.

Well, Dweezil is the most appropriate name. This puppy got into so much mischief and got away with it with his cuteness. Seriously, I could have hired him as my personal organizer as he quickly 'decluttered" our home by destroying about everything. I am not kidding and how he lived through all of this without us flipping out, I will never know. Truely, he is a DWEEZIL!!!

Dweezil will be one year old on Thanksgiving.  How appropriate.  He is such a blessing
Happy Saturday :)

frumpy frump

Ever since my husband lost his job when his former company was acquired by another company earlier this year, I have lived with a big yucky cloud over my house.  There are multitudes of things that are much worse than this life event, but my husband wants to work again and to him, that means now, not later.  He is actively seeking, but can't settle himself until he lands another position.

 I do not like that he won't be happy "until".

Our lives go on whether he has a position or not. Time passes, flowers grow, they die, and the reseed.  The sun rises and it sets. 

I am sad he is sad.

I know he has a wealth of knowledge that would enhance a company looking for his skills.

I believe that company is out there, looking for someone like him.

I want him to chose to be happy until the two meet.

Faith

Days are frantically busy, but nothing gets done.

 I feel suspended, but never still.

Time flies, but yet it crawls so slowly.

Periods of reflection, joy, determination, love, frustration,sadness, fear and hope.

I don't know where the road leads, but I know I am not the one in control.

This is the time to trust and believe.

I will.